First of all, if you are a person who really, truly has that kind of a reaction to snakes, you should stop doing that immediately. Snakes are beautiful and misunderstood. Here is a link to The Center for Snake Conservation to help you get over it and move on to fearing real things, like lycra leggings.
Second of all, I have new snake pants. Yep. So International Pants week here at Highland Fashionista HQ is rapidly becoming International Pants Month (I do think about other things, I assure you. Sometimes I think about t-shirts...or maybe socks).
These just sort of happened. I was in a Glasgow shopping centre, feeling sort of despondent over the overall quality of the fabrics and cuts that were on offer. Lots of sheer, flammable material, and not a lot else. We've all been there. I wasn't really looking for anything at all. Just hoping that something would jump out and inspire me.
I wandered into H&M with an open mind. They always have affordable plays on trends that won't make you feel like an arse for spending a fortune when, a season later, you can't remember what you were thinking when you made the purchase. I even thought I was being silly when I took the python-printed cream skinny jeans off of the sale rack and into the dressing room, certain that they would make my thighs look like the trunks of two giant albino California redwoods.
I liked them. A lot, actually. They fit well, and they debunk a few myths that I always thought were true about printed pants as a genre. I have taken the effort of listing these myths below for your ease of reference.
- Printed pants make your legs (and ass) look huge. Nope, although I suppose it depends on the print. The lovely thing about snake print is that it runs vertically, and is quite elongating to the legs.
- It is difficult to pair a printed pant with anything other than a plain top. Nonsense. I actually had a fuchsia cabled sleeveless cashmere sweater on with these pants before the photos, and I would have kept it on had I not spilled almond milk all down the front of it. Python works really well for pattern and texture mixing, because of its subtle gradients.
- Snakeskin pants are best left to the under-thirty crowd. Shut up. You clearly have no idea who you are talking to.
So there it is. My new snake pants...a happy, happy accident. Just like the song says, it goes to show you never can tell.
In conclusion, there will be a few of you who are undoubtedly confused as to why a 40 year-old professional sans children owns a stuffed snake.
I borrowed it from somebody.
|Fergus the bearded collie claims his property. It has a squeaker in the head and the tail.|
The Sum of All The Parts
Pants - H&M python-print skinny jeans
Tank - New Look
Cardigan - J. Crew mohair cardigan
Shoes - Unlisted (old), but here are some cool ones from Chinese Laundry
Ring - my own (old), but this one in Sterling Silver and 14K Gold is AWESOME