The Stark Reality

Sexy, right? Just tryin' to keep it real, y'all.

Like the rest of you (if you're doing what you're supposed to be doing in these times, and you'd better be), there is simply zero reason to trot-out the fancy-schmancy clothes during a pandemic. It's not like we're going anywhere right now. And while yes, I still do wear my "real" clothes around the house, and still fully plan on continuing to shoot posts full of outfits that I cannot wait to wear once we start being able to go places again, a pandemic is a time where function simply must come before form. I don't know about you guys, but I fully intend on staying alive through this thing so that I can cross the finish line as a salty old woman, and not in my current permutation a salty 48 year-old.

A Strategic Approach to Dressing to Go Out of the House During a Pandemic

Yeah, I know it ain't pretty. As I said in the last post I'm a nurse practitioner, and therefore considered an essential worker, as is my husband, who is a ferry skipper. So as much as we're trying to avoid going into town or anywhere other than out into nature for dog walks and such, I simply have to go out sometimes. I have to get to work. My husband has to to sea. And as hard as I try to stretch my supplies when my husband is away, I have to go to the grocery store.

We've created what we call our "decon" area out back - where we can disinfect things that come into the house and remove our shoes and clothes that we've been out in, allowing us to make a beeline for the washer and the shower. In trying to streamline this process, I've gone from my preferred style of dressing in layers (and...well...you know...anything cute that might resemble something an adult female might wear), to essentially two outfits. Both of which leave me looking like a combination of a recently-escaped serial killer and a hillbilly extra wandered off the set of Justified.

Outfit One: The All-Purpose Insulated Coveralls

Ok first of all, yes. I own insulated coveralls. A good set of insulated coveralls is a thing a lot of women may not ever even think is a thing they might need - unless you originally come from a place like Wisconsin, as I do. These babies are warm. But more importantly, and the real reason I am wearing these to go back and forth to work, is that I can essentially zip myself into them without even bothering to put on anything other than my skivvies, pull my boots on, go to the hospital to work my shift, then once I've ditched my scrubs, zip myself back into it, and head home. It makes the whole "decon" experience a hell of a lot easier once I get home. When I add a mask to the look (as I do when I have to hit the grocery store after my shift), it is a look that very convincingly says "stay the f** away from me, I have a bottle of Jack Daniels in one pocket and a sawed-off shotgun in the other" - which in these times of needing to maintain distance is helpful.

Outfit Two: The Texas Tuxedo

This here's my dog walkin' outfit. Jeans (or whatever I'm wearing that day but probably jeans), a hooded puffer vest, a sherpa-lined denim jacket, and the same Ariat Fatbaby boots that I wear every single time I go out. These boots live just outside the back door now. They used to be my equine massage therapy boots. In fact, a lot of this stuff is from my "horse clothes" pile (I'm also a human and equine massage therapist in addition to being an NP), but now that we're distancing, they've become my every-time-I-go-outside clothes. Yes, it looks like I'm getting ready to muck out a stall, but with all the rain we get here in Scotland, going for a walk in nature can end up being every but as messy as mucking out a stall. And also yes, it really is still that cold here in the Highlands. I'm looking forward to dropping a few of these pieces in the coming weeks. I may have to get an uninsulated pair of coveralls to add to the collection as the season progresses Won't that be fun.

Stay safe everyone! Wash your hands!